Austin Half Marathon 2008

OK, folks. Go to www.attaustinmarathon.com, look for H549.
Hoping for better than 2:59.
The race starts at 7 a.m., Central time.
It's freaking cold right now.
It's one of those 'it's 42 degrees but feels like 39' days.
I am supposed to meet up with people this morning -- some TnT teammates and a former co-worker doing her first event (congrats, Christy, a.k.a. runnerish), but it might be a little dicey.
There's probably going to be 40,000 people at the corner of Congress and Cesar Chavez.
But the fireworks will send us off like they did last year, right, Motown?
I miss you this year, more than you could know, but maybe next year, you and Amy can be on either side of me as we cross the start together.
I'm still 100 percent sure we could never cross the finish together, but hey, we should try, right?
One mile at a time...
Go Team!

Yes, a post

Lordy, lordy. It's been a while.
This post comes to you live, from Austin, Texas. On Sunday, I'll do the half marathon here again, this time without MotownRunnerGirl. WAH!
Take a trip down memory lane to see what happened last year.
I'll post more on Saturday once I head to the Expo.
I think I'll cover it like a journalist!

QoD: Do we like the question of the day? Seriously?

Relenting

The Christmas update letters finally got to me, so I thought I'd write one, too.
It would have been nice to have mailed this before the holidays, but maybe it isn't too late?
Here goes:
If I were to use a journalistic method to summarize what 2007 was for me, it would be this:
Somewhere along this bumpy journey, between tremendous amounts of physical and emotional loss, I found myself.
Life isn't easy, I get that now.
I chose to challenge myself the best way I knew how -- I started running.
Along with the sore muscles, joints, ligaments and tendons, things started to change.
It became a healthy obsession, a need, eventually a want. I had to do it. I didn't feel good unless I did.
A few falls occurred, but I got back up.
I joined Team in Training, and they helped me achieve, but mostly, they gave me a reason to be. They taught me I should matter.
I trained and ran three half marathons and completed my first marathon -- 26.2 miles -- in June.
Twenty-six point two was the most amazing thing I have ever challenged myself with. I also raised, with the help of friends and family, more than $4,500 for blood cancer research.
That was very moving to me because so many people I loved were touched by cancer. It is evil.
There were other losses along the way, painful ones only time will heal.
But I will heal someday. So will the ones I love.
There's been lots of tears along the way. They still come. But because of people like you, I can endure them.
For people like you, I MUST endure them.
So if you are reading this, chances are you are part of the equation, a piece of the puzzle that, once put together, made the difference in my life.
I believe each of us is here for a reason. I'm not quite sure what mine is yet, but I'm here until I find out. Once I know, you'll likely read about it here.
Thank you for going with me on this journey. I couldn't -- and can't -- do it without you.


QoD: Why do you think are you here?

2007 Dallas White Rock Marathon

No. 9252 is the lucky number.
Go here to keep track. Go Team!


QoD: What's your routine three days out from the race?


Image from www.runtherock.com

Ready to run

Pasta party is tonight. I am already in full race mode -- trying but not being successful in getting enough sleep or food.
As much as I like to carb load, I can't seem to clean my plate.
It's been heavily chronicled in this blog that last year I did this alone. No team or running partner, no one cheering in the crowds. I like to say it was just me and God, as it had been when I trained myself for this race last year.
This year, buddies Staci, Clay and Ian have said they'll be at mile 10, handing me my last bits of fuel that I don't have room for on my person, and hopefully some water or a beer. So nice of them, as the race officials have started issuing warnings about humidity, heat exhaustion and unseasonably freaked out weather that is expected tomorrow. We're hoping Chicago's curse doesn't hit Texas.
I am hoping for the right amounts of energy for tomorrow.
I'm psyched about the race. Lunch with Eric and Buckle yesterday before the Expo was just what I needed. We talked about our first events, how emotional they were for us and what that feeling at the start line in the middle of the crowd at race start is like.
Electric. The sights, sounds, smells, it's all just amazing.
Can't really describe it, but between that and MotownRunnerGirl's chronicling of my first event, I think it's safe to say:

"...I'm ready to run,
I'm ready to run,
I'm ready to run,
I'm ready to run...ready to run...
ready to run...yeah I'm ready to run. I'm ready
Whoa I'm ready to run...I'm ready...I'm ready to run...
I'm ready to run...I'm ready
Oh I'm ready to run..I'm ready."
--The Dixie Chicks (uh huh, also on my iPod):

QoD: What's your big challenge right now and are you ready to run with it?

The Expo

Went to packet pickup and the expo with Eric and Buckle, former colleagues and my local running inspirations.
Buckle, Eric and I went to the expo last year. It's a new tradition. It also gives me a chance to see my old buddies at my former newspaper.
This is funny. I am thinking about what things were like this time last year as I prepare for my event on Sunday.
When I did White Rock last year, not only was it my first event, but the first big thing I had ever done by myself.
Well, to say I did it alone isn't quite true. I was out there with a lot of people. I did start the race with some friends.
I crossed the finish line by myself and drove myself home. Like a big girl. Ha.
This time last year I had this, too, that got me through.
Can you believe it's been a year already?

QoD: Should 2008 be a year for out-of-town running trips?

Wha. what?!

They said no iPods.
Don't.
Words like disqualification and danger and ... well, I don't care. I'm wearing mine.
I'm aware and appreciative of the run, of it all.
I may not be elite. You won't see me sail down that road at an 8-minute-mile pace (it's actually more than 12 on a really good day) but I'm a runner just the same.
I was motivated after reading this in the November issue of Runner's World.
I think my favorite is this one:
I AM A RUNNER because I know that despite my best efforts, I will always want more from myself. I will always want to know my limits so that I can exceed them.
That's by John Bingham's No Need For Speed column. Thanks.
==
So back to the music.
I have 169 songs on my iPod. About seven hours worth.
There are songs that have the word run in the titles. One with the word feet, another with the word heel.
Born to Run
Ready to Run.
Head Over Feet.
Head Over Heels.
Lots of alternative, rock, acoustic, dance.
All just my favorites that make my meditation during running so memorable sometimes.
They all have a purpose in my run.

QoD: What tunes get you through?

deja vu, kinda

We had the biggest turnout tonight at Wednesday night run for the first send off for winter season Team in Training events.
The Wellstone Dallas White Rock Marathon is Sunday, the full starts at 8 a.m., along with the relay, and the half at 9, The full and half events have been sold out for weeks now.
NO IPODS.!!! That is another post before Sunday...
Tonight, the WRers did their three miles because we're tapering, while the Austin and Disney full runners did their five. I'll pick up the Austin half schedule next week in my attempt to keep busy.
Our hero Dave and his wife stayed late. They drove up in his new porsche, walked three miles and went to New York Pizza and Pasta with us. We had to pull eight tables of four together. Biggest group yet
We celebrated runners and the December birthdays. Lots of pizza, pasta and wine.
Dave was talking to us about how fast he's taken the Porsche -- 120 mph. He's got a radar detector that not only lets you know when the cops are around, it lets you know how many and where they are. He says she's a sweet ride.
Our winter season shirt says "This one is for Dave." Yep, it's his season. He is no longer in remission.
I've been nostalgic lately. Spiritual, too, but I am in memory mode.
Last year this time I was two months into running and suddenly going to run my first event, the one I'll do on Sunday.
I'm really doing this again for two reasons:
1) It was the first event, always special in my heart.
2)That first event for me, on Dec. 10, 2006, is the day Michael died.
I'll probably always do it for him.

QoD: What are your thoughts about your first event?

countdown to the race

So the White Rock Marathon and Half Marathon is this Sunday.
Psychotic Texas weather will be 67 degrees at the start of the full.
May the water gods keep the liquids flowing.
I am running the half again, this time with the team.
Tonight we have the TNT sendoff and we'll talk about Pasta Party.
Look for another post tonight.
Races make me want to blog.

QoD: How do you keep blogging when everything in your life collides?

Image is from pegasusnews.com, 2006 poster.

My first Trot

Hi friends!
Tell me that absence makes the heart grow fonder? I'm training again, so there will be lots of musings to write about.
The 40th Dallas Turkey Trot was Thursday. Yep, my first.
It was 38 degrees and windy.
My college buds Pam and Loretta talked me into doing the Trot with them and their daughter. Took my dog, Niki, who did the three miler with them and their dog, Snickers.
This was Niki's first event, and she did great!
Christy, aka Runnerish, ran with me, this was her longest mileage so far, as she's going to (hopefully) do the WR Half, too. Please register soon, C-Ro, will you? They are almost full.
I treated this as a dress rehearsal for the White Rock Half Marathon, which is in two weeks. A bit sore after the run. Did the 8 in just under two hours.
Afterward, Niki and I went with the girls to East Texas for a Thanksgiving feast with Pam and her family. We were surrounded by nature -- Zebras, Elk, Deer. This place used to be a nature preserve, so there were lots of animals just running free.
I'm thankful to be running free.

QoD (remember this?): How do you feel when you run free?

Image from www.thetrot.com

Cocoon

My sister Becky gave me this box when I was a little girl.
Inside of it was a caterpiller, a white cylinder-looking thing (cocoon) and a book that explained metamorphosis and lifecycle changes. It had a picture of a Monarch butterfly at the very back.
The cocoon intrigued me.
I looked at it with wonder every time I held it.
Would it break open if I touched it too much?
Does the light affect it?
Why are there these two things and a book with pictures of butterflies?
Metamorphosis.
Once I knew what it meant, it intrigued me even more.
How is it that something can exist, stop, change and appear to be reborn?
Stages, science tells us. Lifecycle stages.
When the caterpiller begins to change, it is taken over by a silk that becomes a cocoon. The way I understand it is that the cocoon's purpose is to protect the Monarch until she is ready to emerge and fly.
I've walked into silk lately. Lots of friends have worked together to weave that layer of protection for me. I've needed it, and I thank you.
Wouldn't it be nice if when we went through lifecycle stages of change that we could emerge as beautiful as the Monarch?
It's not about the beauty, it's about the journey. Again.
It's a good thing I am buying new running shoes. This journey seems to have no end.

QoD: Who weaves your cocoon? And are you ready to fly?

Photo credits: University of South Dakota Web site on phenomena.

P.S. Ten miles last Saturday. Both IT bands are sore. Nine this Saturday. Soon, we head to White Rock for a few dress rehearsals before the big day, Dec. 9.

Snowflakes

Andy's comment on my blog posting about loss has me thinking about snowflakes now.
He is so right, none are the same, they are all different.
It reminded me of the first time I saw a snowflake.
I was about nine years old. It never snowed much in San Antonio when I was growing up. They actually sent us home early from school so we could play in the snow -- before it melted.
I remember it was a Friday afternoon, likely in January or February. I remember telling my Mom that the yard looked like someone had spilled a bunch of raspas, or snowcone shavings, in the grass.
She laughed and said if I caught snowflakes in my hands, I'd notice that they are all different. Of course, I paid attention for a second, agreed, but never really noticed it. I just wanted to play before it became slush.
Years later, Mom crocheted snowflakes for our Christmas tree. She made four of them, for each kid. We each had one to hang, whichever one we grabbed first.
"Mom, they aren't the same," I told her.
With that mom look, she said, "Mija, they aren't supposed to be!"
It was Christmas 1991, seven months after Mom died, Daddy sat the four of us down at the house so we could divide up the Christmas decorations. This was Mom's favorite holiday.
Boxes and boxes of glass balls that my parents had collected through their 45 years of marriage.
Lights. Angels. Cheesy paper cutouts with glitter that each of us made through the years during school. The four snowflakes that my mother crocheted
years earlier.
I don't remember which of us said it, but it was noticed.
"None of these are the same." They are unique.
It's kind of like the four of us, I thought, as I sat next to my siblings, reminiscing with some tears about Mom and the decorations we sifted through.
You're right, Andy. There's no right answer for how to deal with loss. It's the memories that get us through, help us endure. Never forget.
So, it's really not about snowflakes, I guess. It's about people.
Thanks, Andy, for reminding me of the things my Mom would have said to me.
I am listening.


QoD: How many times have you thrown away cards or letters written to you by your parents?
(Well, stop it. I wished I would have saved one thing, anything, my mother wrote me.)

Find True North, runners!

There's a monastery of cloistered nuns on my running route, not far from my house. It's just southwest from where I live.
The Discalced Carmelite Nuns, Arlington Carmel, don't know me, and I don't know them. But, in a sense, they are my True North, the place that I run to and past everyday for strength. That's where I get my energy from.
They are followers of St. Therese of Lisieux.
I ran Saturday morning, past Mt. Carmel, in anticipation of MotownRunnerGirl and her peeps, who will be running the half at the Detroit Marathon today.
Hopefully the sisters' influence on me, from 1,000 miles away from my northern friends, will help them out this morning.
I only did five (not my full nine because I've worked the past three nights and I've been waking up too late and without enough time to do the complete run and still chill before work). But when the Michiganders are running their race this morning, I'll finish my 'Saturday' run while I do a sympathy -- or envious, rather -- four right here in my hood, and toward my True North.
I'm going to have to visit the monastery someday. Maybe the sisters sing vespers at Christmas? They should. For the real True North.

P.S.: Northerners, good luck. And MRG, don't forget to post your times. Or eat that juicy burger with a big, cold beer. :-D

QoD: At what point did you realize True North was calling you? And did you listen?

(Pictures from above from carmelnuns.com. St. Francis, at bottom, is mine.)

One year later

I’ve come full circle.
A year ago this month, I started running. Actually, I started walking. Then, it turned into running.
I ran in fog Tuesday morning. It was thick enough to slice. I wore black, so I felt I was among the clouds.
It was a bittersweet anniversary. Lots of loss right now, so I’m distracted. It makes it difficult to celebrate sometimes.
I had a meltdown Tuesday morning when I ran. Full-blown tears. I bet I looked pretty.
It’s the loss – personal and otherwise.
Coach Neil told me Saturday that I shouldn’t run the full White Rock Marathon in December because since I didn’t run for two weeks (vacation and board meeting), I’m behind in training.
He doesn’t think I can catch up without getting hurt.
I thought of that Tuesday morning when my shins started hurting about a mile into the run. My fault, I didn’t stretch or drink enough water last night. He’s probably right, I don’t want to listen, but I will.
Loss.
Maybe there’s a reason I have to do the WR half again.
Improve my time?
Keep tabs on my team?
Erase last year’s bad memory since it was the day Michael died?
I think a lot when I run. Tuesday was different. Way more intense.
Sometimes I don’t feel anything. It’s like floating. It’s just me and the music.
And too much time to think.

I get too flooded with things in my head.
I miss my best friend.
No WR full this year.
C lost the baby. She was more than half way along.
I miss Michael.
I miss my family.
What the hell am I doing with my life.
See? No rhyme or reason, it just rolled in, like the fog. Right into my head.
Sorry I’ve been away. I think now you probably know why.
I’m a little distracted.

New to the blog: I want to pose a question of the day. It could morph into a thought, but right now I’m into questioning.

QoD: How do you learn to live with loss?

Think about it, and answer, please.
And thanks for reading.

Mexico

Sept. 22-28, 2007
SAYULITA, Nayarit, Mexico -- Ah.
Hola, amigos! Que bonita esta la playa aqui en Mexico!
Sorry, folks. Thinking and dreaming in Spanish for six days is a beautiful thing.
Brenda, Deb, Sarah and I have been staying in a really awesome house high above a village about 40 minutes due somewhere from Puerto Vallarta.
We helped Sarah celebrate her 52nd birthday on Monday (Sept. 24). The week has been full of great times, food and drink.


The four of us have noticed that the people of Sayulita love dogs. There are lots of them and they like to comb the beaches with the people. There are very few cats, and they seem to only come out at night.
What is great about this place is that there are mostly locals here -- they might not all be native Mexicans. They hail from somewhere, but they are locals now, and enjoy the same things we have this week:
Beach.
Sun.
Tequila.
Margaritas.
Sand.
Beer.
Ceviche.
Pico de gallo.
Guacamole.
Salsa de tomatillos.
Fish tacos.
Carnitas.
Quesadillas.
Beer.
Tequila.
Margaritas.
Did I say Margaritas? They are HUGE and carry a punch that not even I can handle. I had to, um, lay off of the tequila on Tuesday after having a few of these on the beach. The waves were amazing, too.
It has rained every night since we got here last Saturday, but today (Friday), it has rained all day long.
We fly back to Texas tomorrow. We're hoping for one more afternoon of sun (it ain't happening today) and one more blast of the sun Saturday morning to solidify the tans for the rest of the year.
So, ojale que viene el sol, amigos!

salute to the king tonight

Just when you thought it was over, a two-hour special airs tonight on Elvis. It's been 30 years since his departure from here.
OK, I guess we could say death...
Seriously, could you imagine him doing the hip action at this age?
As the running docs say, motion is lotion.
If anyone could do it, he could.
Happy Tuesday.

Happy Monday

Dear Fans of Circle30,

So sorry that I have been AWOL. My sister, Becky has been after me for weeks to blog. As has Margarita, Amy, Andy and my niece, Marisa.

Life lately has been a little much. I kind of feel like I've needed a refill, kind of like this glass of water.


So apologies for not keeping in touch, especially for the relatives, who reminded me that absent my trips home, this is the only way they know what is going on in my life.

So what's everyone been up to?

I've been running. I went to Michigan and ran the Crim and saw the Boblo! Coach Neil proposed to Becky (not my sister) at Wednesday night run. She said YES!

Soon, I'll write about Crim weekend for the Michiganders. I'll try and do that before I head to Mexico next week.

Until then, hasta. And remember, I love you all.

liz

Whew!

I had a really good run today.
It was one of those runs where it's sunny outside, there's actually a breeze (in August), and, according to St. John's marquis, it was 76 degrees.
It just ... felt really good.
My morning running route is a busy one. There's three churches and one Catholic school. A doctor's office. A grocery store/shopping center. A 7-Eleven. Taco Bell. Subdivisions of brick houses. A park. A convent. Rush Creek winds through it.
Headed West down the road from my house, just beyond the Kroger shopping center, is a huge house on land that is about two and a half lots large. They have two horses.
One is larger than the other. The top of the smaller one's head reaches to about the jaw of the big one. I imagine it's mother and child. The horses' small field abuts the park.

This morning, as I listened to my iPod and enjoyed the run, I glanced toward the field with horses. They were standing thisclose to each other, one almost leaning into the other. They were watching the people in the park.
That was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I was overcome, really.
I just love it when I have a good run like this. Such clarity, peace. No pain in the knees!
Well, it was only three miles, but I guess that really means that I only have seven more to go for the Crim in Michigan this weekend!
I have so much to do between now and Friday morning...

I found him!

Who woulda thunk it?
Elvis Presley is living in a gated community in Roanoke,Texas!
Actually, it's long been rumored that The King was in the Lone Star State, just hanging out, taking care of business, and keepin' it real.
Speaking of TCB, I haven't been doing that lately with this blog. It seems forever since I posted anything -- yes, it has been ages, really. That's probably why I am discombobulated about everything in general. No outlet, so I'm back. Maybe blogging will get me back in sync.
So hello!

Back to Elvis...
The 30th anniversary of his "death" was last week. Sources spotted several Elvis look-alikes and movie characters at a recent party in North Texas.
Think young and old Elvis.
The cape. The gold suit.
Think "Viva Las Vegas."
Think "Harem Scarem."
Don't forget some tackiness thrown in, too...
It was a good rememberance of The King, even though he really couldn't make it.
He was likely TCB somewhere else.

What else have I been up to? Went to a roller derby bout this past weekend. Very fun and interesting, but that's another post...
In other news, I'm going to Michigan on Friday, this is Crim weekend!
I hear it's cool there. It is really hard to imagine taking a long sleeve shirt anywhere right now. It's only been in the upper 90s this week.
I hope I'm ready for the Crim. I haven't run as much as I should be, work is really kicking my ass, and there's been a lot of stuff going on in the other layers of my life.
No doubt, though, I am certainly ready to see the Michiganders and some cool weather!
So for those of you who have stopped by and shared thoughts about your journey, sorry I've been away.
For those nice thoughts, I say, in the words of The King:
Thankya. Thankyaverymuch.

Getting ready

I missed much of the meeting the other night on being a Team in Training mentor. I was working. New job but really the usual stuff that happens when you work for a daily newspaper.
I arrived right after the pep rally and pizza, just in time to break out into groups and talk about who does what and when. Blah.
So I had to get back into the picture archives and see what I might have missed.
My only experiences other than what we have done with the DFW Metro Running Team were in San Diego and the pasta and victory parties.
These folks were crazy excited for the participants.

I seriously felt like I was at my high school pep rally the time our basketball team made it to state. Electric. Exciting. Energizing.
It will be fun to capture that for others who are just about to make their decision and sign on the dotted line to raise money for LLS.
Frankly, the best part about being able to go through all the motions is to watch the others and their reactions, their changes. I know I changed.

Crazy, I think I can do that. Make up, colored, foil hair? That, too.
Just the chance to watch, listen and learn. Run. That's what I'm looking forward to.

Dr. Doogie "fixed" my other IT band issue. He says "run, what are you waiting for?" Thank God. I am waaaaayyyy behind training for the Crim.

No running today, however, up early to read all and every bit of news. The (new) inmate (me) will be running the asylum. My editor is off.