Saturday, May 31, 2008

Wanda Whompya and her Skates of Truth

When Staci left Dallas a few weeks ago, she took Wanda Whompya with her -- kicking and screaming, I hope.
Anyway, I promised readers of Circle30 that I'd continue the story of my friend Staci and how I became a HUGE roller derby fan again, and how Wanda Whompya and her Skates of Truth became my hero.
My love of roller derby isn't a new thing, really. I used to watch it with my dad when I was a kid. It was something he and I did together. We'd go to the wrestling matches at the Municipal Auditorium on Wednesday nights, and on Saturday nights, we'd watch a horror movie and then roller derby, without fail. (This was before I started driving and spending weekend nights out and about).
I met Staci after she moved to Dallas last year to work at my former newspaper. It wasn't long afterward that our core group of friends who hung out was introduced to Wanda Whompya. We started going to see her bouts. She skated for Assassination City Roller Derby. She was a Lone Star Assassin.
Today's derby is not like I remember it growing up. Girls in fishnet stockings, mini skirts, tattoos. Knee, elbow, wrist pads. Helmets. Mouth guards. Crowds of fans in attendance. BYOB as long as it's cans.
It's pretty sweet seeing girls on skates kick ass up close and personal. How I wish my dad could have been seated on the second row with me (because chances are good a rollergirl will knock your lights out if you sit on the first row) to watch Wanda. He'd be tickled, especially doing shots with her afterward at Lee Harvey's.
So Wanda and I got pretty close. She tried and tried to get me to try out for derby. I came close, I have a sweet pair of skates that rival my best running shoes. Two hours of skating feels like running a 10K! Rollerskating is great cross-training for runners, you just have to, like the ACDerby people say, watch your head -- and feet and knees and ankles and arms, etc.
Wanda's a tough broad who fights fair, watches your back and is as loyal as the day is long.
Kinda like Staci.
I'm not convinced this was really a relocation for Wanda. Or Staci. It's just a detour.
So Staci/Wanda gave me some goodies before they left Texas. There was a message in the bag.
Inside was purple fishnet stockings, a black skull bandanna, knee highs with guns blazing (ode to the LSA's), Band-Aids and candy roller derby girl cigarettes.
What might she be trying to say?!
Wanda, you're friends and fans will miss you. Derby won't be the same without you, and you won't be forgotten. I'm hoping you can come, visit and guest skate or something, have a Lee Harvey's burger, a shot of tequila and a Tecate.
I await word on your next team and vow to fly wherever I need to go to see you skate again.

Here's, rather, cheers, to Wanda Whompya and her Skates of Truth.
Oh, and take care of that bony shoulder.
xoxox, MUAH. :-*

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The Lone Star Assassins will sorely miss our former captain Wanda, and we'll always hold a spot on the team for her if she should ever find herself in our path again. And yes, Miss Thang, Wanda was telling you something...purple fishnets? That could only mean you were meant for LSA! ;)

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