It was April 14, the morning after the second week that North Texas was under thunderstorm and tornado warnings. Cold doesn't even describe that morning.
I didn't open it because I knew that there would come a time when I would need it more than I did the day I did my 15 and a half.
I needed it this morning when I awoke at 4:45 wondering wtf I was thinking when I signed up to do 26.2.
The bag that went from the back of Sarah's car to the back of my Jeep to the coffee table to the kitchen table and then back to the counter over the course of about a month was now in my hands.
I gave it a shake. Then I opened it and took out a lavender piece.
A run begins the moment you forget you are running. Adidas.
Six months ago I would have laughed at reading that statement. I have discovered that it's true.
Then the obsession continued.
I worry about my knee.
I worry about not raising the money, although it's paid for, but I still have to try harder.
I started to empty the bag.
Lots of blocks with words. I love words, I make my living this way, so they mean something.
Its funny, I have been thinking a lot about high school and when I ran track in my sophomore year. I wasn't lightning fast, I was kind of slow, so my newly graduated-from-college-(Texas Aggie)-coach didn't care for that too much. She just wanted to win.
I just wanted to finish the season.
She wanted me to quit.
I stayed.
We both hated it, but neither of us blinked.
Needless to say I have never forgotten her, nor will I ever...
So the next piece of advice I pulled from the pile seemed very appropriate as I thought of that year so long ago:
Only one person and one person only will determine how good of a runner you become ... You will become as good as you let yourself be. That one person is you.
Thanks to Laura and Maria and Coach Neil for the goodie bag. The words will keep me up and motivated for the next 30 days.
Much love and thanks to Sarah, approaching her two-year anniversary as a breast cancer survivor. She is going to San Diego and will run this marathon with me. You are my hero.
Thanks to Sammy, who weaves in and out of this blog. You are my brother.
I can't forget MotownRunnerGirl, whose inspiration started me on this journey back in October over drinks in some bar in D.C. Thanks, too, to Margarita's blog groupies, TnTers and others, who make me laugh everytime they stop in (even when you are dissing my Spurs).
Gracias to all of you. Just don't get sick of the countdown, which begins today.
6 comments:
That bag of inspiration is very cool. We do not have them in our area...what is a TNT Captian? Great job on your training.
yeaya!!! you will love this journey, girlie. it is like nothing you've done before. that goodie bag however made me feel like a bad mentor!!! i never did anything like that for my team...shame, shame. anyhow, the amazing thing about this race is that the tough part, really, is now. putting all those miles in, the months of training. the day of the marathon is a celebration of all your training and hard work. and you have the luxury of enjoying that on that very day. good for you. you now inspire me.
Will M be inspired to join the rest of the TNT Crew for the Chicago Marathon this fall?
hm. interesting question. i think i'm doing halves from now on. but perhaps!!
al: my TnT captain coordinates all the mentors, alums and volunteers on our team, especially at fundraising events like our wine tasting and silent auctions. she also makes sure the mentors rotate at providing food and other stuff for after our saturday runs. she runs with us, too.
basically, we do whatever she says!
happy cinco!
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